Category Archives: Personal

Checking Out Of Social

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…for now.

Over the past few years, I’ve used social media as almost a full replacement for real social interaction. It started out nicely enough and I’ve definitely interacted with plenty of people that have changed me. Some positively, few negatively, and the rest have been there. Unfortunately, with time what I, and others, want or need has changed, not unexpectedly; operating as if nothing has changed leaves me feeling somewhat empty.

July and August of 2008 was when I started actually using social media for purposes outside of just keeping up with friends on Myspace and Facebook. I ended up on Pownce, Twitter, Friendfeed, Ustream, Seesmic and others in rapid succession. That was also when I began taking blogging a bit more serious, in retrospect a very bad thing.  I decided sometime around then that I had to interact and add value on Twitter every day, no matter how small.  I kept it up for a few months pushing a motivational quote or video in the morning to try and lighten the increasingly gloomy situation.

Come March and April of 2009, Friendfeed rolled out their real-time site and I became instantly enthralled in the interaction on the service. It was so far superior to anything at the time, and still to most today, that I gradually stopped devoting time to the other sites. In between April and August of 2009, I interacted and got to know many people on Friendfeed, one in particular was Holden Page who people used to confuse with me and likewise me with him.

August 10th, 2009: The day that Friendfeed was lost; Facebook purchased Friendfeed and in the next few weeks, a large portion of the English-speaking community leaves. This push left only the most diehard lovers of the site and community there, but with the knowledge that it’s not going to get better and there is a chance the plug will get pulled. Every time something new has come along the question has been, “Will, or can, this replace Friendfeed.” The answer never an absolute yes, and nothing came by that could truly match the service with it’s community for nearly two years.

July 2011, the weary ship set adrift just a few years, yet a lifetime, ago finally scrapes against something that can truly match it, Google+. When Google+ launched it immediately became a haven for the reFFugees, and has thus sucked most of the remaining members of the community away. My community there is now gone; it’s not where I want to be any longer, as shown by my interaction recently. I guess I could try to embrace Google+, but it is not the site or community I want.

So for now, I’m checking out on actively utilizing social sites. Will I come back? I don’t really know. I’ve had fun over the years, but it’s mostly been for naught or worse. With the time I’ve recently had, I’ve had time to think about a lot of things that matter and those that don’t. I want to spend more time creating value that is going to last and less on the frivolous affairs.

P.S. for Friendfeeders: Right now, I don’t think I’ll be going Full-Cristo, but it could be a possibility in the future.

P.P.S. to Louis Gray: I know it’s probably your job, but please don’t encourage people to +James Fuller on Google+. 😛

Processing The End

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The Emptiness…

It is a lack of fulfillment, both metaphorically and in actuality. It is the knowing that something should be done, how it could be done, but stressing out over how it will be done. It is the ever present NEVER.

Never finished.

Never shown.

Never critiqued.

Never. Never. Nev…

Many Endings…

With many starts, there also comes many endings. And while all things eventually end, there is a period in the middle that can be seen as an end, temporarily. That middle, however, doesn’t contain the finality of an ending. It could, but it often doesn’t. An end: Must be declared. Must be defined. Must include some sense of finality.

To not have those, you have many threads. These threads are silent, until ruffled. They are known, but not seen. They are ready to be wove together, to be knotted. The knot is the end, but…

…Never Seen

Process Undefined

Without a solid process, with an ending. One that can be declared complete. There will be no final solution, though there may be a solution along the way.

Fighting against an end, is natural. It is nostalgia. It is delusion. There has to be a process that demands a sacrifice of resistance. Fighting the end is futile. Fighting the resistance to the end is key.

A well defined process removes friction. It makes the end have definition. It bears the path to follow. Thought can consume a process as process removes thought.

Destroying the Habit

Forget what you know. Remember what you know. Fight. Fight for your freedom. Freedom from yourself. Freedom from your habits.

Your freedom depends on the destruction. The destruction depends on how well you fight. Your tools are the ability to think and the ability to act.

Think of a process. Act on the process. Repeat the process. Think. Act. Repeat. Process. Process.

Habitual Creation

Finality in the process.

 

The Game Can Change In A Blink

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…Or how dreams go can go down the sink.

Earlier, this evening I found out that my cousin was pregnant, but she’s like a little sister, so I feel like I’m going to be an uncle. I’ve been having a hard time trying not to judge and just be happy, but it’s hard. She’s known for years what she wanted to do, and has had it all planned out, and then out of nowhere a surprise that’s going to shake her life. The unexpected turn that can derail even the best laid plans. Now I’m trying to fight myself off, I know she’ll be a great mom, but I can’t help but wish there was another way.

I’m fighting myself over being judgmental, but also fighting my own hypocrisy; when I was 16 my girlfriend got pregnant, it wasn’t mine but that didn’t matter to me. I offered to help her raise it, and be the father that the child would need, and started prepping for it. A few weeks later, after having discussed it, but without telling me until it was done, my girlfriend had an abortion. I understood the reason, fully, but it still hurt, then as it does now. My girlfriend, was trying to get rid of a bad dream for her, and open back both of our opportunities for the future.

During those few weeks, I felt invigorated, filled with more passion than anything before. During those weeks, I realized I had to fight, not for me, but for the child’s future. I’m not a fighter, when it comes to myself, I do what I do to survive, but I don’t really try harder than that. It’s unnatural to me. Tonight, that passion was revived,  this time I’m fighting for not just my ‘niece/nephew’ but also for my cousin’s future. I really don’t want to see her end up on the same path, I’ve gone down. I don’t want her dream to die.

It’s time to drop my humble approach towards life: Allow life to happen. It’s time for me to grab the bull by the horns and take this life for a run. The only thing that could happen is that I fall, and have to get back up. Infinite Upside. I’ve got nothing to lose, and so much to give.

…Or why business plans stink.

So far this post has been pretty personal, now let’s talk about business; business plans to be exact. The idea of a business plan is to provide some guidance about the market, your growth, competition, and strategy to achieve that growth. It used to be that the plans were long-term, 5-10 years. The problem with this, is that as our world becomes ever quicker to adopt new changes, your strategy can be invalidated. You very well may be stuck playing checkers, while everyone else plays chess, if you stick to the business plan.

If you want to stay alive, you have to change your strategy to fit the new rules of the game, otherwise you will lose. This means that you need to constantly be on the ball, and willing to change as you get new data, which requires that you actually acquire, analyze, and adapt to some set of data. And you need to be constantly aware, but also have some lag on decisions, so that you don’t get stuck working on a fad. Business plans have become near useless, for long-term prediction.

The important things now, aren’t the plans, per say, but that you understand your market and competition, can do what you say, and are willing to keep going with the feedback you get. You have to preempt competitive maneuvers and always be on the look out for new competition. The game is now not just about who gets there first or who does it better, but who does most of what I need, how I want

If you do everything according to plan, you will be beat, there is no doubt in my mind. You become predictable, you have to change the game that’s being played, and adapt to the new rules, when others change the game. If your plan is invalidated, don’t fight to save the plan, take that information and adapt to it. If you can’t stop there, then maybe you should go hang out with the telecom and cable giants, they’ll keep clawing to keep their duopolies on the market, but the casket will close on them if they aren’t careful. The status quo is deadly.

Be prepared to go to the brink, for what you believe.

You’ve got to take everything you’ve got and just go headlong into the fray. Life doesn’t stop because you want it to;  don’t try to stop it. Enjoy it, all of it, even hardships. What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger, after all. Make your moves with patience and diligence, but do make your moves before the clock stops.

“When the going gets tough, the tough get going.”

Nerds ‘n’ Verses

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Today, Slippy, a friend on Friendfeed, and I got a bit wild and started dropping free verses in a bit of a rap-battle, except we were using our keys instead of our lips. All in all it was just a little bit of fun, but you can definitely see the geekery. Also with a few one liners are, Steve C, Alex Scoble, and Mark J. So not quite on the same topic of normal posts here, but it’s fun, maybe I’ll get around to actually writing something more serious one of these days, but for now, this is what you get.

Proof and Eminem Freestyle *Very Rare* – http://www.youtube.com/watch… ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
This is awesome. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Heard some of Shady’s freestyle over the years. I freely admit the man is a lyrical genius, seen us, throwing out words I ain’t never heard, word, making sense since I don’t know when. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
then ~ Slippy #teamfondue
rhyming like orange with a four-inch reflector ~ Slippy #teamfondue
defector ~ Slippy #teamfondue
why you wanna go and call yourself Hector? ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Hector? Who the fuck is Hector; call me Dr. Lector. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Eatin’ your brains in the primary sector ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Like a zombie wearin’ abercrombie and fitch, bitch, still running round like y’all don’t itch ~ Slippy #teamfondue

Dammit, Jimminy, now I’m reading everything in a hip-hop tempo and my brain is trying to rhyme everything I read. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Sweet, what a treat, you must be dancing in your seat. ~ SteVe C
So elite, like a Lotus when you know I can’t focus ~ Slippy #teamfondue
DAMN! It happened again! ~ Slippy #teamfondue
And again, but for without pain there is no gain. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Must resist! Please desist, my rhymes are falling like rain ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Drip. Drip. This will be a trip. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Like a bum dropping acid in the drain. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Welcoming Wonderland, through the rabbit hole. Down. Down. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Deep underground, deep in slumberland, not so mainstream, got my training, like a fix-gear hipster when it’s raining. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Got my wheels on, can you see, son? Your rabbit hole got twisted, so, like inception, recollection, we gotta go deeper on reflection ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Through the seeing glass, well on our way. Grass so green, on the other side, let us go and play. Nothing snide. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Let it slide, like a mirror, silver’d on one side across the river, where the other side is mine. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Fine fine. Let it be, that today this day in May, we see to it, that others get bit. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Like the hand that feeds, smokin’ weed, Imma sign you over my deeds, no shit, y’all be tryin to quit, but this type monster havin’ none of it. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Type ‘monster,’ with a long stir stick. Pull out my bic and take a quick hit. We got the green, so lets not end the scene. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
See your green, turn it brown while I turn it around. You ain’t quittin’ so I’ll keep spitting, playing this scene like a teen. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
The best shit in town. You and I keep hitting like Ali rope-a-dope. Ain’t if fittin that neither of us ready to cope. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
I’ll take your Ali, and your soap on a rope, when you called him Clay, had that dope on the ropes, name of Cooper, no play, back in ’63 was the day, what you say? ~ Slippy #teamfondue
You shot one through the hoop there. It’s getting expensive and I can’t pay. Back in ’63 my parents weren’t even a thought to be, let alone me. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
See? Cooper’s name was Henry, and I weren’t even Slippy-to-be. Still nought but a twinkle, while old men were wrinkled, the man was a Brut, don’t you see? (I guess you have to be English to get that one) ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Okay I’m done taking a tinkle. We just made history, it ain’t no mystery. Fighting five wide and five strong. I’m truly surprise that we lasted this long. But see now I’m lost, so I guess you’re the boss. We done talked movies, music, boxing, introduced some Lewis Carroll. Farewell. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Well that’s swell, ain’t no blame, no shame now you’ve dragged me through hell, ring that bell, you ain’t throwing the towel when you battled so well. ~ Slippy #teamfondue

Slam the cages, through the ages. Rhymes flow, free to blossom and grow. Slippy why must you protest so? ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
I protest so, I’m the best though, like an uncaged beast in a vest when I’m rhyming, Slimer’s sliming, can’t help but keep opining with mages ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Rages. This is it, before I have a fit, I shall let you be with your opining and rhyming, being and seeing. Your brain be mine, found upon the B-Line. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Sweet rhyme, ride your A-train, straps a-hangin’ like there’s no pain. Peace. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Verily, I hath quit. Your fortitude in providing statements with much verisimilitude have me beat, so now I must retreat. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
In admitting defeat, guess you win, I got nothin ‘cept these two feet, marching me off the stage, while you get paid. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Me get paid, while you get made? The key hangs low, so you may know. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
So, turn it in the lock when my mac is cocked, safety off and I’m drawing the ace of spades ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Look at the clock, I’m not trying to block, but soon everything fades… to black and back. Now it is your turn to take another crack. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Smack! When you pave your way to a cock-block, time to rack this track, take up the slack ~ Slippy #teamfondue
I must bow, I don’t have shit, so lets just shelve it, and be done with this, now. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Wow, you still callin’ quits? So be it, I ain’t sore, let’s call it a draw.
~ Slippy #teamfondue
Maybe too soon to end, but this one is on the bend. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Bending time? That’s sublime, did you guess yet, I only got six rhymes? ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Do not fret, because I too only have six rhymes. *Flicks sticks* Pick up some chicks, and party when you hear the chime. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
I got time, nuthin’ but, got lyrics flowin’ outta my butt like monkeys, dancin’ on your grave while I’m funky ~ Slippy #teamfondue
You monkeys have not wings. So I can’t bring a straw man, a tin man or a lion. Flings Toto. (because I can’t sing Toto) http://www.youtube.com/watch… ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Back in Zion, I’ll make you extinct like the dodo. You may bring complex, but son, I ain’t vex this ain’t Gattaca. You must think I’m some kind of Hobo feelin’ pain like the rain I bless down in Africa ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Jacking in, red pill, blue pill. The machines will never win. Judgement Day will never come to those who board the Nebuchadnezzar. You can check my blood for vodka, and you might think it’s odd cause it’s clean. I kicked the habit, and checked it twice. I even made sure I didn’t have lice. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Nice, like Trinity, my only vice. Affinity. Don’t need no jack, ridin’ out this Agent attack, I got skills that’ll make you think twice. ~ Slippy #teamfondue

Time ebbs, as this message crosses the web. Let these words not end in rhyme. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
One more time? 😀 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
friendfeed is so sublime ~ Alex Scoble Has A J-O-B
Once more, for sure? ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
*A new challenger appears* ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Like deBeers, bringing diamond lyrics that are fine ~ Slippy #teamfondue
A dropping the rhymes to play with subtle ties, no lies. This is your victory for a diamond lyric that was truly slick. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
like Rick Moranis, what the time is, when I say it with a Texas accent, outta traction, can’t rhyme with orange, that’s a fact, son. *drops keyboard* ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Honey I shrunk the kids, they went from four foot to four inch and orange. *Slams lid* ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Orange like your tan, riding four inch rims in your van, I’ll shrink your money, don’t care if it’s funny, coz in Texas again I done found a new rhyme ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Pulling out my abacus to count the number of times you’ve tried to drop hexes by using Texas. The amount is many, but if all it costs is a penny for every time, it still be free. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Guess you’ll need them beads to count to three, which is one more than the times I’ve claimed rhymes you can’t see, when the only rhyme I can think of for "van" is pronouncing "rhyme" like it were spelled "rahm" ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Damn. ~ Slippy #teamfondue

Two white guys rap-battling on FF, each declaring the other the victor. Only on FF, amiright? 🙂 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
As a kite flys high. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Sigh. 😉 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
We be bad here in the FF hood! #sorry #genewilderSilverStreakimitation ~ MarkJ
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKERRRRR! 😀 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
oh was this stand off battle feild > http://friendfeed.com/jimminy… ~ Peter Dawson
Peter, the field was more, I believe there were four. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
And each one, declared a draw! ROFL! ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Soon one will thaw, there is no law, that says it must be win, lose, or draw. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Sore? This ice be frozen while you just be dozin’ I got rhymes comin’ through by the score ~ Slippy #teamfondue
No sore, the phone be ringin’ so I had to stop flingin’. I’ll rick it, pick it, and stack the shit so high. Your score should say bye. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
High? Your score be finite, while I ride the twilight, somewhere ‘tween here and the sky, I can wait til tomorrow is nigh. And if you ain’t sure, tho the battles were four, we added one more, now it’s five. ~ Slippy #teamfondue

This is so much fun, I fear for when I must run. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
🙂 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
My face hurts from smiling, with our four-time simultaneous rhyming ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Piling on, let us not stop until this results in subcutaneous wounding. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Bringin’ doom in, I force rhymes like I’m zoomin ~ Slippy #teamfondue
We be boomin’ lets kick it up, pick it up, jump back in the game, we can build some fame. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Fame that’s fleeting, ain’t just bleating, I got words that’ll hurt like a bee sting ~ Slippy #teamfondue

Well that train has run out of steam. What a dream. Hope y’all enjoyed the show. The next one will be a ball, ya know! ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Word. And yes, we really are finished now. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
What’s funny, is it started out as me trying to troll you. I didn’t want you breaking away from the tempo. 😛 ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Really? I never noticed. I guess I must be immune to trolling 🙂 [edit] Or was it the troll got caught in his own trap? ~ Slippy #teamfondue
I think I got caught, that’s why I kept trying to end them. 😛 ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Same here, dude. Same here 🙂 ~ Slippy #teamfondue

Dude! We should cut a record or something 🙂 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
LMAO ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Information break: British boxer Henry Cooper knocked out Cassius Clay back in 63 (9 years before I was born) with a most awesome left hook. In their next match (66 I think) Clay beat Cooper to a bloody pulp. Both remained firm friends for many years. Cooper actually passed away yesterday. He was also widely known in the UK for advertising Brut 33 aftershave, one of the two best-known gentlemens grooming products of the seventies. The other being, of course, Old Spice. 🙂 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Ah, now it makes sense, I think we have Brut over here, but it’s extremely pungent, if memory serves. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Very much so. Vile stuff. ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Also….dude, that was epic. We’re done now, right? ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Yeah, I think we’re done. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Thank fuck. I’m exhausted! ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Me too, the phone rang three times, and I’ve had to get up and use the restroom as well. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Well, my phone didn’t ring, but I’ve had five bladder-breaks and half a bottle of vodka during all that! ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Heh. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Do you mind if I take screen shots or scrape the text of these, to preserve them? ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF
Hell no I don’t mind, I was thinking along the same lines. <<<unintentional rhyme <<<and that one 🙂 ~ Slippy #teamfondue
Heh. ~ Jimminy, CoG of FF

The Simple Styleguide I Follow

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I was asked to provide an overview of a project that I was working on and I ended up providing a style guide in the overview documents and thought it was worth sharing. It’s in no way all encompassing, but it provides a good core for self documenting code, in my opinion.

Simple Styleguide
Naming Conventions
-   Files
   -   Always lowercase
   -   Words seperated by an underscore
   -   Controllers
       -   Named after the functional  area they are meant to add
   -   Models
       -   Named after the table they access in the database
       -   Tagged with a _model to denote the file as a model
   -   Views
       -   Named after the controller which requires that views
       -   At most 1 primary view per controller
       -   You can provide a sectioned views using the sections folder
       -   Sections should be stored in a folder named after the primary view
           -   e.g. /views/sections/{primary view name}/logged_in.*
       -   Tagged with a _view to denote the file as a view

-   Classes are capitalized version of file name

-   Function/Method
    -   Words seperated by an underscore
    -   Generally use a verb at the beginning to describe functionality

-   Variables
    -   Normally named after the field they access
    -   Create model objects as m_{model name}

Spacing
-   Indenting
    -   Uses spaces instead of tabs, 2 or 4 spaces
    -   Classes
        -   Brackets start on next line at the same level as the class
        -   Brackets end on the same level as the class
    -   Functions
        -   Brackets start on the next line at the same level as the function
        -   Brackets end on the same level as the class
        -   Add a new line to split functions up for readability purposes
    -   Control Blocks
        -   Brackets start on same line as the beginning of the block
        -   Provide one space between the end of the logic and the bracket
        -   Brackets end on the same level the control block

Extra Bits
-   Functions that have a similar focus should be close to each other

On Suicide and Negativity

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This was published by accident, and as such is lacking in the actual content I wanted to add, so I’ve added an addendum. I’ve also thought of taking it down, but some people responded positively to it, so I’ll keep it up with only minor editing.

I have been thinking quite a bit about suicide lately. Just thinking about it, it’s not something I could follow through on, anymore. Life is absolutely worth living. It has caused me to make changes and continued thinking about what I’m doing and what I should do. It is also a leading edge in my personal views.

For some background, I’ve made 3 serious attempts over the last decade, though the last was over 4 years ago.

My first was when I was 11, at school; one day the teacher walked out of the class room and I climbed into the second story window, and leaned back to roll out onto the sidewalk. Luckily, two other students grabbed my arms just as I had leaned back, pulled me back in, and convinced me it was stupid. During this period, I also used to drag my head on the ground while swinging trying to use the force to snap my neck.

The other two attempts occurred when I was about 15 or 16, once with a gun, and another jump attempt. I took my stepfather’s .22, off of his workbench in the garage, out into the woods, and sat there thinking about what I would miss for a few minutes. I then placed it up to my temple and pulled the trigger. Nothing happened. My stepfather, keeps the magazine empty and the chamber clear, when it’s not on his person. I walked back to the house, placed the gun back on the bench, and went into my room and cried myself to sleep.

The other time, I walked out to cliffs near my house, and down to a little bench, that we used to look at the river from, because it was clearer there. I got ready to jump, but again decided to think about what I would miss, and sat down and thought about my girlfriend at the time, who was also suffering suicidal tendencies, and how much that might affect her. She had lost an ex, on her birthday a few months earlier, when he hung himself. I decided to walk away from this one, but almost accidentally succumb due to the slope getting back off of the shelf, and the leaves slipping from under my feet. This was, and will be, the last attempt I ever made.

I realized at that point, that my actions are selfish. I don’t just take my life, but I could ruin so many others. I also realized at that point, that death isn’t to be feared or fought against. To deny death, is to deny life. Life is to be enjoyed and filled with happiness.

My job of filling my life with happiness is often harder when I add socialization to the mix. I don’t like when people fearmonger, it’s one of biggest gripes, because it creates a negative mindset. I also try to avoid those with negative mindsets, because it doesn’t help anyone. Being positive, but even more so realistic, is the best that can be accomplished. Lately I’ve seen so much negative thinking, it’s bringing me down, and making it hard to keep the thoughts down.  Also people who say I can’t, make me sad, because I am filled with hope for individuals, and it shows that they aren’t filled with hope themselves.

*Addendum*

I am an optimist through and through, but I’m also a pessimist at heart; this makes it easier to tear things apart and find a solution. I see potential in everyone, this is why, “I can’t,” annoys me so deeply, and even I am prone to excuses, but I loathe them, and try to find ways to subvert them in myself and others. I only turn my back on people, when they take advantage of me or others, to my knowledge. I also realize that life is filled with negatives, and these can make it seem like you can’t, but there is often a way to spin the negativity with optimism or ignore it, if there is no real ramifications to that ignorance.

“Just be…” The only time you have is now. Be happy. Be inviting. Be courteous. Be free. Be you.

*Addendum fin*

I just don’t have time for negative space, and negative thoughts and arguments. So I’m done with it.

Living Last Mile

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I apologize for any cursing I do, this is an issue I fight with daily, and it’s a ridiculous one.

I live in semi-rural WV, but I also live without adequate access to information, at a nominal rate. In order to get an internet connection, where I live it costs roughly $50 on top of a phone bill for 768kbps ADSL. There is also no means of getting television, besides paying for satellite service, which also doesn’t come with local channels f or some absurd reason. Ever since the Analog-to-Digital transition in June ’09, the reception which is known to be bad in mountainous areas, dropped completely off the map, because it became an all or nothing signal.

What you end up with is exorbitant costs for minimal service, even though people within a mile, have no such issues; cable is provided along the main road on the backside of the property, but it’s about 3/10th’s of a mile. Currently, the two bills are $80 for TV, for mid-range satellite service, that isn’t 2/3 Christian broadcast, receiver rental, and 2 broadcast station feeds, that should be locally provided, and $65 for Phone & Internet. It pisses me off to know that just because we live just outside, the service area of the cable companies, we are charged out the ass.

If our house was moved less than half a mile, we would have a more stable internet connection that is 10x as fast, basic enough tv with local stations, we really only need broadcast stations. For about half the price. This needs to be addressed, as well as anti-competitiveness in areas, companies trade off in areas and create virtual monopolies on local markets. I’m just frustrated at how close, and yet how far the access to information is, and I also know that I’m not the only one in the area that feels this way.

Our nation, has turned its back on those that live last mile, and the infrastructure required to provide its citizens decent access to information. We are solidly driving forward, in improvements, but those improvements are generally within the large metro areas, where they see maybe a 2x increase ever 3-4 years, while those living last mile slip further behind. I understand it’s not feasible for the companies to create the infrastructure, that they won’t see a return on any time soon, but there has to be a way to improve our nations information infrastructure(IPv6 should be included).

Super WiFi is probably the only decent technology for this area, considering everyone is stretched rather thin, the infrastructure costs would be lower, but that’s not a likely roll-out option for at least 4-5 years, if not a decade. That’s how slow progress is, when you’re living last mile. It’s infuriating to see improvements so close, and simultaneously know that it will be held right in front of your face, but out of your grasp.